Kids...probably why my men don't last.


 My title is not a fair statement. My kids are amazing. My son loves his mama and always looks out for me. My daughter is my mini me, has a huge heart and is probably one the the funniest people you've ever met. Unfortunately though, as they get older, the take on more and more of my sarcasm. Most men can't understand our relationship and they definitely don't understand our sense of humor. Maybe some of you will get it at least. Or, maybe I will lose some followers because we are definitely a little different. 

Since my divorce I have dated here and there and had a few somewhat long relationships. The longest being 4 years, then 2 years, then 1 and then well yeah they just get shorter and shorter. I choose to believe it is because I am finally getting pickier and tolerating less. It could be because when I introduce a guy to my son he immediately says "hey new stepdad" or "which one is this again" or "what are you buying me for Christmas?" Yeah, I know he is joking but it can make a guy run for the hills.  I do actually laugh when he says these things but sometimes I have to kick him and say "hey, be serious I actually like this one."  Once I had a guy stay over because he had a little too much to drink. My son was 18 at the time but still he wasn't supposed to be coming home so I thought no harm in letting him stay. The next morning I get up and let the dogs out and my son is in the kitchen. I tell him to stay quiet because my guest is still sleeping. When I walk back into my room my son follows me and gets in the bed. I could have died right there. I tell the guy I am so sorry and that my son has a terrible sense of humor and that I feel so awkward. My son says "why is this his first time?" Yes, at that moment I had no choice but to laugh because as awkward as it was it was pretty hilarious. The guy laughed and everything was fine. Next week he ghosted me. Honestly, it was pretty funny and my son and I still laugh about it but he isn't allowed in my room anymore just in case. 

My daughter takes a different approach. She will straight up ask me in front of the guy if this is my midlife crisis. Or sometimes even worse, she will tell my family about the guy. No guy wants to endure the 100 question game from my sister and brother. My sister once met my date and I for dinner and literally asked questions for an hour and then just said "eh, he is ok but do whatever you want." Yeah, that makes a guy definitely want to be a part of our family. 

All in all though I just accepted a position with a new company and it is a great opportunity. I can honestly say that when I was married or in a long relationship, I was settled and comfortable. I didn't try to achieve any higher goals because I didn't need to. So being single has given me the push I needed to succeed in my career. I guess I should thank my kids and family for helping me with my success. Or I could just keep swiping and matching to at least keep the humor going. 

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